Hmm … I know philosophers dwell a great deal on the nature of friendship. Their thoughts on it, in a way shape our perceptions on what friendship should be or should not be like.
So wise words like “No friendship is an accident” or “The only way to have a friend is to be one” continue to influence our approach toward it.
Personally, I think we need friends in our lives. Good friends especially … You know “People who need people ..” thingy. I could still remember the lyrics of this evergreen. It resonates with me because it aptly reflects my needs. Friendship brings happiness, and in no small way, also adds a special kind of richness to our existence. But I also believe that friendship is always “a work-in-progress.” Simply said, we need to attend to our friendship and nourish it.
I guess that’s why some friendships endure and some are allowed to fade … Mine too has taken the same route. In a lot of ways, time, circumstances and quirks can put a damper on the steadfastness of a friendship. But still it’s better to have friends and to lose some than not to have friends at all.
Hehehe … Sorry but I digress …
I am very fortunate to have friends who value their ties with their friends. Amidst their busy schedules, they give a little of whatever time they have to nourishing their friendships. Maybe a “little” is a relative word.
And I share the same sentiment.
There is nothing like time to help bonding and blending! What ever the age! What ever the phase of life we are at!
So for Hani, Azizah and I, what basically constitute our attempt to strengthen our friendship?
Simple. We just meet up when time allows it. And Azizah who resides over in Batam couldn’t conceal her delight at having us over. If distance is thought to be one of the ingredients that help bring people together, then that little stretch of water separating Singapore from Batam, has simply done a wonderful job of strengthening our friendship.
The fact that Azizah is an excellent cook is of course, an aside worth mentioning. She simply makes mee siam and nasi goreng mouth-watering. And I mean that literally and metaphorically.
“Whew! Pedas! Mintak sikit lagi,” said Hani unabashly.
Hehehe … Hani is very discerning in her taste and any compliment from her … is … well … a rare compliment indeed!
Our friendship has come a long way, going back several years now. We have met, gone our separate ways and meet up again. And each time we meet, the chatter has lingered ever so joyously on the things that we did the last visit. The howlers … the bloopers … whatever …
Maybe it’s us in Batam or Azizah with us at the East Village, Tanah Merah … It does not really matter.
What matters is that we have given our friendship the tending to that it requires. And in between also accord it with the space that it needs – to be free and to savour its own lightness!
Hopefully in appreciating our friendship, we will always remember this wise counsel “Be slow to fall into friendship, but when you are in, continue firm and constant”.